Month Three..

Soooooo.... Remember how sweet and happy my two month post was? Well month three proved to be a little more challenging. Things are getting real in our house and life has started getting messy. There are still good times, but there are lots of difficult times too. God has lead me to read several passages when I have really been struggling. Each time the verses remind me of our purpose for walking down this path.

I randomly opened the bible one night when I was having a very difficult day. I opened to Luke 6. Wow. What a gentle reminder of how I should treat my kiddos. 

^{Luke: 32} “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. ³³ And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. ³⁴ And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. ³⁵ But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. ³⁶ Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

 Just last night I felt like I needed to read Colossians. Wow God. Thanks. Another amazing reminder that we were all once hostile, evil, and alienated, yet the GOSPEL has reconciled us. We have HOPE in the gospel. We have HOPE in the hard times we are facing.

^{Colossians 21} And you, who once were alienated and hostile in mind, doing evil deeds, ²² he has now reconciled in his body of flesh by his death, in order to present you holy and blameless and above reproach before him, ²³ if indeed you continue in the faith, stable and steadfast, not shifting from the hope of the gospel that you heard, which has been proclaimed in all creation^[g] under heaven, and of which I, Paul, became a minister.

Two months!

I had a friend recently ask me what advice I could give her about foster care now that I am a foster mom. Her question got me thinking and these are the 4 main things I could come up with!

1.Foster care isn't as scary as I thought.
I had lots of fears going into the foster care world. I had heard a lot of horror stories. I was scared, but thankfully God gave me the desire to give this a shot. Our story has not been anything like the horror stories I had heard, or dreamed up in my head. It really could not be any better. Our big kids have adjusted great, Adelyn loves having older siblings,our families are a great help, and our big kids do great in social settings!

2. They are NOT their files.
A few minutes before we met our kiddos for the first time we had the brief chance to read their files. It was scary. I was panicked. I didn't know what we had gotten ourselves into. Fast forward a few weeks. I was re-reading their files and was laughing at how different they are in real life. They are just kids. Their past happened, but it doesn't define them. I had always heard that, but now I understand.

3. Older kids are AWESOME.
Plain and simple! I love that my kids can talk and are somewhat independent. It comes with challenges, but the advantages way out weigh the disadvantages.

4. Our marriage has NOT been ruined.
This was a biggggy. I had heard that foster care puts a huge strain on your marriage. Honestly, having Adelyn was way harder on our marriage than adding our two big kids. We work together and we laugh at the craziness going  on around us. We are a team have had a blast going through this together. I think we might even fight less now!

I prayed and prayed for us to have a positive experience with foster care. I can honestly say, this has been a great experience. I love our kids and I love this crazy, beautiful story I have been blessed to get to be a part of. We definitely have hard days and days when I think this wasn't such a good idea, but those quickly pass. God is making beauty out of ashes and I get to have a front row seat.

Mommy War...

I read this blog and thought it was perfect.

I hope you take a jump over to Rage Against the MiniVan and read it too...

"I don’t much care if you breastfed your kid until they started kindergarten, or if you fed them formula from day one. I don’t really care if you turned your infant car-seat forward-facing prior to age 2, or if you homeschool, or if you send your kids to daycare while you go to work. Do you cosleep? Did you circumcise your son? I DON’T CARE. Do you babywear? Push your kid around in a stroller? Use a leash for your kid at Disneyland? Whatever. Good for you.

When it comes to issues of motherhood, there is one issue I care about: some kids don’t have one. All of these petty wars about the choices of capable, loving mothers is just a lot of white noise to me, Quite honestly, I’m often astonished at the non-essential parenting issues I see moms getting their panties in a wad about. Particularly when there are so many kids in this world not being parented at all."

Rage Against the MiniVan

Training Date!

For our foster care licensing, we have to get two full days of more training. We finally got an email with our first date! On May 9th, we will get our first day of training! I am working on finding the second half either before that date, or shortly after. Whenever we have two days of training finished then we can schedule our home study!!! After the home study we will be licensed and waiting on the phone calls!!! We are praying to have all of this finished by the end of May!

That point.

Today I have reached that point. The point of control over my situation. I have exhausted very option to get a baby. There is no other "process" I can start to get closer to having a baby. I am dossier ready for an Ethiopian baby. I have done all of the stuff on our side for foster care. There is nothing left to do but wait. I have no more control.  

"There were scars before my scars
Love written on the hands that hung the stars
Hope living in the blood that was spilled for me
Ohh control. It's time. Time to let you go.
Control. It's time. Time to let you go."

Announcing...

In November 2010 I got the baby bug. I wanted a baby, but I wanted to do foster care. Ryan wasn't super excited about it and honestly did not really care to do it. He knew it was something I truly wanted to do and he was supportive. So we started contacting agencies and found our match. We were eligible to foster through Theraputic Family Life. We started the paperwork process. Things were not going smooth. Everything we attempted to do just didnt work out. Looking back it was obvious that God was moving in us to get us to our Ethiopian adoption. I don't remember how it happend, but for some reason the foster care plan came to an end. We just didn't do it. We did start our adoption and you guys all know that story!
We found out a day before we were DTE that our agency had increased the wait time for referral to 18-24 months. This was a blow to us. However, it was also an unexpected reopened door. Ryan actually said we could start the foster care process again. He was 100% on board with it this time!

Everything about this go round has been different. Our paperwork is about finished, we have done our fingerprints (again!), we have completed our CPR/1st Aid training, and we have gotten our reference letters (again!). We are just waiting on our training (again!), and our home study (yep-again!).
We have been working on this stuff for about a month. It is flying by and our prayer is that we are licensed for emergency foster care by the end of May.

Our PLAN is (we know how well those work...) to be a family for a baby that needs a place to stay for a short time. Maybe until they get a permanent foster family, or maybe a just break from mom and dad. Really I don't know what this will actually look like. All I know is I am super excited and getting ready for a baby!!

This weekend my mom and I went out to our church's garage sale and to a few children's consignment shops. We had a great time and it was sooo unreal to be really preparing for a baby!! We didn't buy much because we have set pretty big age parameters. We are getting licensed for 0-4 years old, boy or girl! I did buy a bunch of cute girl clothes that I am currently washing right now!!

I have been hesitant to mention our new plan because I have been nervous it will fall through again. We are getting so close now that I don't mind sharing. If God has other plans for us this summer, we are open to it. But as of right now, we are planning to be welcoming children into our home!!  Please join me in praying it all works out!!

Request!

One of my besties is in the process of adopting domestically. They started their process right after we did ours. There was even a little talk about them adopting from Ethiopia too! However, God had different plans for them. They finished all their paperwork around February, and have been waiting for THE call since then! I know it doesn't seem like a long time, but "most" people we know or hear about get "the call" within the first few weeks. So it was a little sad at first, but then God occupied their minds with a mission trip to Ethiopia!! They have been getting prepared for the trip and staying busy, and  today they GOT THE CALL! There is a PRECIOUS little boy who is ready for adoption! My friends accepted the call.

If your like me you think that is it! But, it isn't! In this type of adoption apparently you get the chance say if you would want to adopt the baby. Then, they also ask other families if THEY would adopt the baby. So all these waiting families have an opportunity and deadline to accept the call. Then if they do, someone (IDK who?) will look through all the families and decide which family they think is the best match for the baby! Now, I might be totally off here. From what I understand that is how this works....

I have two reasons for blogging about their adoption. One because I am ooooooh so excited for them!! I almost started crying when she told me they got the call! Everything about this baby is just PERFECT for them!!! I am sooo happy and hopeful!!  Then, two because nothing is final yet! They have to get chosen to be this little boy's family. I want you to join with me to pray for God to allow my friends to become the parents of this little boy!!! God is good!! Pray that whoever is doing the selection will know without a doubt that they are his parents!! Lets lift up this family and pray that this waiting period is quick so they can get their sweet boy home!

Thanks :)