Yesterday was a reality check for me. I had two different occasions when I was hit in the face with the real life reasons we are pursuing adoption. My first experience was with a girl we will call "R". R's mother considered given her up for adoption. R is now a young teenager living a life far from happy. She constantly gets moved around to different family members that are in her words "not right". She has no security and is expected to focus at school? R told me she wished we would have been adopted because her life is so bad. Y'all...break my heart! It took everything inside of me change our age range up to 13!! As if R's story wasn't enough. I met another girl last night, we will call her "B". B has been in and out of the foster care system since she was 8. B has a loving foster mother now and from the outside looks like she is thriving. B hasn't had it easy. Im sure she has a lot of hurt inside of her, but she is safe and receiving the love she deserves.
It was just a very real day yesterday. I had been having some confusing thoughts as to why the heck I am adopting a baby, and last night God reminded me why. There are real kids out there that need loving, stable families. I have love ready to pour out and engulf a child. I know that I can provide a secure, stable family for a child that would otherwise get lost in the "system". These kids are real that need families. They are real.
I am not sure I have ever felt more sure of our adoption decision than I do today. Ryan and I are called to do this and I can't imagine passing it up.
If you feel even the slightest tug at your heart while reading this, please look deeper at that tug. That is the pull of God starting something in your life that you don't want to miss! I would love to talk more to you if you need some advice! You can email me at Arin19@aol.com
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Created for Care
This past weekend was a great weekend! I attended the Created For Care Retreat in Atlanta, GA. Me and one of my besties, Beth, that is adopting domestically had a great time together!
I would say I had two three four highlights of the actual retreat. It was totally great, but these things realllly were the icing on the cake!
Speaking of cake, lets talk about food! These ladies knew what women want. FOOD! They had great meals, but even better snacks! We had all the sodas and candy we could want for free all weekend. They even had one of those candy shelves that they have at candy stores filled with some healthy and some not so healthy treats! Every night they provided multiple types of cakes and desserts. At one point during the weekend, they even had free ice cream bars! Yes. The food alone would have been worth the trip!!
On a more serious note the next highlight was the experience of worshipping with over 400 women who have a heart for adoption. Sometimes I would catch myself just staring around the room thinking these women all know what I am going through. All these women get it! Most of the worship songs were cleverly geared towards trusting God and his timing. It was so much more powerful to sing those songs with these women that clearly have had to trust in His great timing and release their plans to God.
The last highlight was the most personal one to me. If you have read anything about this retreat you have probably heard of the Date with God session. I was very apprehensive about this because I thought it was corny. However, we got into the room and the leader explained that we shouldn't talk to anyone else. It would be like being on a much anticipated date with your hubz and your chatty friend comes up and talks the whole meal. Something about that picture whipped my mind into the mindset that this was in fact a "date" with God. So for the first time (maybe ever) I just sat and released myself to God. I just really felt like God wanted me to talk about myself. He wanted to hear everything I was holding in, He wanted ME to talk, He wanted all the attention on ME. I know that sounds weird and kind of not really the way God works, but it was something I needed. It was really cool and I am glad I went and had that experience on a Date with God.
Ahh! Driving in Atlanta in this HUGE (haha) SUV!
Yes we were only gone for the weekend...
Speaking of cake, lets talk about food! These ladies knew what women want. FOOD! They had great meals, but even better snacks! We had all the sodas and candy we could want for free all weekend. They even had one of those candy shelves that they have at candy stores filled with some healthy and some not so healthy treats! Every night they provided multiple types of cakes and desserts. At one point during the weekend, they even had free ice cream bars! Yes. The food alone would have been worth the trip!!
Although...it gets better!! Not only was there great good but they had some awesome ministries represented. I was a little excessive the first night there and bought something from just about every booth. (Well maybe not, but I did buy a lot!). It was just as cool as I had imagined seeing and meeting some of the women behind these ministries!
I was pretty pumped I met and talked to Kelly Putty from Ordinary Hero.
Here is a run down of the ministries we got to support!
My African goodies :)
Our new t-shirts!
On a more serious note the next highlight was the experience of worshipping with over 400 women who have a heart for adoption. Sometimes I would catch myself just staring around the room thinking these women all know what I am going through. All these women get it! Most of the worship songs were cleverly geared towards trusting God and his timing. It was so much more powerful to sing those songs with these women that clearly have had to trust in His great timing and release their plans to God.
Adoption Friends!!
The last highlight was the most personal one to me. If you have read anything about this retreat you have probably heard of the Date with God session. I was very apprehensive about this because I thought it was corny. However, we got into the room and the leader explained that we shouldn't talk to anyone else. It would be like being on a much anticipated date with your hubz and your chatty friend comes up and talks the whole meal. Something about that picture whipped my mind into the mindset that this was in fact a "date" with God. So for the first time (maybe ever) I just sat and released myself to God. I just really felt like God wanted me to talk about myself. He wanted to hear everything I was holding in, He wanted ME to talk, He wanted all the attention on ME. I know that sounds weird and kind of not really the way God works, but it was something I needed. It was really cool and I am glad I went and had that experience on a Date with God.
Overall. Great retreat!
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
The trouble with IF.
Ryan and I have some great things going on in our lives right now. Some of those things are public knowledge and some of them aren't ready to be shared. All of the stuff we have going on is really exciting, IF it all works out. IF....that is a word that has been haunting me the past few months. I have been caught off guard by how much I let the implications of that word harden my heart. I have started not allowing myself to get excited because what IF it doesn't work out? The IF has really crushed my spirits and so not typically my style. I think because I want this stuff to happen so badly that I am trying to guard myself from disappointment. One example is our adoption. I am really so excited about it, but I haven't even let myself go to the true excitement of becoming a mom. I just keep thinking what if Ethiopia closes the doors to adoption? What if the wait gets even longer? Will I ever get my Ethiopian baby? Then comes the doubts of what will happen IF I get a baby... What if he has too many issues for me to handle? What if he doesn't attach to me? What am I doing!! It is a deadly spiral and the devil definitely steals my joy, kills my excitement, and destroys my mood! And this my friend, is not the way I want to live my life. I want to rest in the fact that my God is working for my good. I was created to do GOOD works that he has prepared in advance for me to do. He will sustain me and be my rock. He is who I want to focus on and be excited about! So that is what I am trying to do. Focus on God and know that whatever does happen is going to be for GOOD! I am going to try and let myself get excited and break past the wall of doubt because I was created to enjoy life and be the light of the world! How can I be the light if I am afraid to shine?!
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Delivered!
Our dossier has been delivered to Ethiopia. Yep. Pretty excited! Doesn’t mean anything, just good to know it made the long trip!
We are “unofficially” number 83 on the ever increasing and ever slowing wait list.
We got some bad news the day before we were DTE. Our agency increased the wait time to 18-24, just to get a referral (matched with a baby). This was definitely not expected, but it should have been. Things are just slowing down. We pray )and would love for you to pray) that things would miraculously speed up. It’s all in God’s timing.
What does that look like for our family? Well it looks like it will be a long time before we have our Ethiopian baby here. That’s about all I know. I am okay though, I know God has a plan for our lives and He will give us a baby when we are ready.
On a lighter note, I will be attending the Created 4 Care retreat this weekend! I am soooooo excited. I get to see some bloggers that I have been following for a long time, meet other adoptive mommies, worship with those mommies our Creator, and relax! What could be better??
Here are some pictures from the last few days…
A Pig Roast (yes they had a literally PIG) Luau.
My first time to wakeboard! I was up just long enough for a picture!!
What an excellent day!!
My week has been amazing. Probably one of the best weeks I have had in a long time. I am overflowing with joy from having Jesus in my heart!! I hope you all do to and know the awesomeness I am feeling right now. Have a great weekend!!
We are “unofficially” number 83 on the ever increasing and ever slowing wait list.
We got some bad news the day before we were DTE. Our agency increased the wait time to 18-24, just to get a referral (matched with a baby). This was definitely not expected, but it should have been. Things are just slowing down. We pray )and would love for you to pray) that things would miraculously speed up. It’s all in God’s timing.
What does that look like for our family? Well it looks like it will be a long time before we have our Ethiopian baby here. That’s about all I know. I am okay though, I know God has a plan for our lives and He will give us a baby when we are ready.
On a lighter note, I will be attending the Created 4 Care retreat this weekend! I am soooooo excited. I get to see some bloggers that I have been following for a long time, meet other adoptive mommies, worship with those mommies our Creator, and relax! What could be better??
Here are some pictures from the last few days…
A Pig Roast (yes they had a literally PIG) Luau.
My first time to wakeboard! I was up just long enough for a picture!!
What an excellent day!!
My week has been amazing. Probably one of the best weeks I have had in a long time. I am overflowing with joy from having Jesus in my heart!! I hope you all do to and know the awesomeness I am feeling right now. Have a great weekend!!
Friday, March 16, 2012
DTE!
Today is our day!!! We are officially DTE!
What's next?? Well we are at the waiting stage! We just wait for the sweet baby that God has for us. The wait time is really long right now, but not something we are focusing on. God has a plan for us and His timing is perfect, so we are resting in that! This day is super important because it means we are ready. Any day, any time we could get a referral. Let the wait begin!!!
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Oh my soul!
My soul is so blessed this week. I am forced to be grateful and content with the present. I want to say "I can't wait for Friday" because I am anxious of our DTE date! However, if I wish away this week then I will wish away my Spring Break! So here I am. Happy with the present!
We received a pleasant early surprise yesterday in the mail. The White Flags: Passion CD was delivered early! I didn't even know we ordered it, so I was super surprised and excited! Needless to say it has been on repeat since about 3:00 yesterday.
I have started looking a little more seriously at designs for our baby's nursery. I have several themes running around. I just need to pick something and run with it! As I was looking around on Lay Baby Lay, I came across a ministry that makes my heart explode.
Mwana- "At Mwana, our vision is to make a difference for the children of Africa. A visit to the small village of Mgyawi in Malawi, Africa identified a specific need of its children—to receive shelter from the cold night. We are impassioned to help. You can too. For each Mwana blanket purchased, an additional blanket will be personally delivered to a child in need in Africa. Make a difference. Share Warmth."- Mwana Share Warmth.
We received a pleasant early surprise yesterday in the mail. The White Flags: Passion CD was delivered early! I didn't even know we ordered it, so I was super surprised and excited! Needless to say it has been on repeat since about 3:00 yesterday.
I have started looking a little more seriously at designs for our baby's nursery. I have several themes running around. I just need to pick something and run with it! As I was looking around on Lay Baby Lay, I came across a ministry that makes my heart explode.
Mwana- "At Mwana, our vision is to make a difference for the children of Africa. A visit to the small village of Mgyawi in Malawi, Africa identified a specific need of its children—to receive shelter from the cold night. We are impassioned to help. You can too. For each Mwana blanket purchased, an additional blanket will be personally delivered to a child in need in Africa. Make a difference. Share Warmth."- Mwana Share Warmth.
They have the cutest blankets and when you buy one, you give one! Perfect.
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Dossier Received!
Dossier Received! What a much anticipated subject line in my inbox! I literally can't stop smiling! Our dossier made it safe and sound to America World in Virginia. I was told that our anticipated DTE will be next Friday! March 16th,2012. This is the date that we will determine our spot on the ever increasing wait list.
I still have a little anticipation about actually being officially DTE. I am continuing to pray that next Friday is in fact our date. I can't believe we are finished!! It is so weird to be done with the paperchase. It is all out of our hands. Ahhh!!
Here are some pictures to document this emotional/dramatic week in our adoption!!
We didn’t get to go mail it off together, but we had some fun the night before!
I still have a little anticipation about actually being officially DTE. I am continuing to pray that next Friday is in fact our date. I can't believe we are finished!! It is so weird to be done with the paperchase. It is all out of our hands. Ahhh!!
Here are some pictures to document this emotional/dramatic week in our adoption!!
We didn’t get to go mail it off together, but we had some fun the night before!
Before: Compiled Dossier, After: Tracking receipt!
Woohoo!!
What a wonderful day!!
Monday, March 5, 2012
Wedding Day Cry
It is ready. Our dossier has been checked, and checked again. It is tied up and ready to be packaged and mailed. I finally feel a sense of relief. I can't believe all that waiting and preparation is over. I kind of feel like I did after my wedding. I cried a little on the way home from our reception because I just had so many emotions all at once. I have had an amazing array of emotions today! I am exhausted from all the stress of the paperchase. I am relieved that it is over. I am so excited to be in the next "trimester". I am giddy with anticipation of what's next. I am just so happy.
What is next? Well I looked at a few blogs and it should take about a week or so for AWAA to send off the dossier to Ethiopia. We will get an email I guess saying our officially DTE. That is the "dossier to Ethiopia". This is the day that we are known by on the wait list.
We both would really appreciate some prayers for our dossier. We need prayers that we turned in everything and that all the papers are exactly like they are suppose to be. We need prayers that the mail delivers smoothly and that nothing gets lost. We also need prayers for us. We are about to enter an incredible waiting period. I am sure this is just the beginning of my emotional days.
And lastly. Thank you so much to everyone so far! We have had such a smooth and uncomplicated paperchase. We appreciate all the encouraging words, all the sweet messages, and especially just the simple questions of how things are going. It is wonderful to know y'all are thinking and praying for us! We have a very long way to go, but it's going to be a beautiful ride!!
What is next? Well I looked at a few blogs and it should take about a week or so for AWAA to send off the dossier to Ethiopia. We will get an email I guess saying our officially DTE. That is the "dossier to Ethiopia". This is the day that we are known by on the wait list.
We both would really appreciate some prayers for our dossier. We need prayers that we turned in everything and that all the papers are exactly like they are suppose to be. We need prayers that the mail delivers smoothly and that nothing gets lost. We also need prayers for us. We are about to enter an incredible waiting period. I am sure this is just the beginning of my emotional days.
And lastly. Thank you so much to everyone so far! We have had such a smooth and uncomplicated paperchase. We appreciate all the encouraging words, all the sweet messages, and especially just the simple questions of how things are going. It is wonderful to know y'all are thinking and praying for us! We have a very long way to go, but it's going to be a beautiful ride!!
Ahhh! Soo exciting!!
Today was a wonderful Monday! It was a beautiful day outside AND we got our USCIS approval in the mail!!! Yahhh!! That means that tomorrow I will be running down to the Mail Room and mailing off our dossier!!! It is finally here!!!
Thursday, March 1, 2012
#Febphotoaday ReCap!
Day 1: Your View Today
”All girl”
Day 2: Words
”Looks weird, tastes amazing”
Day 3: Hands
”My hands are His Hands”
Day 4: Stranger
”Stranger to Texas!”
Day 5: 10 AM
”Missed 10AM, so how about 10 minutes into the 2nd quarter? #superbowl”
Day 6: Dinner
”Dinner for an army”
Day 7: Button
”Bunco Button!”
Day 8: Sun
Day 9: Front Door
”Finally made it to our destination! Great to see that front door!”
Day 10: Self Portrait
Day 11: Makes you happy
”We don’t like the color white, so we add a little flava! Hot Pink! White Team!”
Day 12: Inside Your Closet
”Just a peek into my closet”
Day 13: Blue
”My favorite accent color”
Day 14: heart
”Makes my heart happy!”
Day 15: Phone
”Love my case!”
Day 16: Something New
”Best something new!!”
Day 18: Time
”Time to eattt!”
Day 18: Drink
*SKIPPED*
Day 19: Something you hate to do
I literally didn’t do anything I hated that day!
Day 20: Handwriting
”Handwriting the book of James!”
Day 21: A fave photo of you
”One of my fav pics!”
Day 22: Where You Work
”Rm 115”
Day 23: Your Shoes
”In my shoes…”
Day 24: inside your bathroom cabinet
”Weird. Bathroom Cabinet”
**SKIPPED**
Day 25: Green
I couldn’t find anything picture worthy that was green!
Day 26:Night
”What a better way to celebrate the Oscar’s?”
**Skipped**
Day 27: Something you ate
I just forgot this day.
Day 28: Money
”Love to spend money fighting sex trafficking!”
Day 29: Something you’re listening to
”Wrapping up an awesome night at The Cellar”
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